I should start this one all the way back in 2022 when Nemesis closed to the public and the marketing campaign for the ride began with the Phalanx being created and taking over Forbidden Valley.
Alton Towers showed that they know what they’re doing when they put their mind to it. The Smiler Takeover wasn’t that, neither were some of the scare maze decisions last year, but to close the ride and hold an event for it, then keep up the hype train all year with various marketing details and documenting the rides retracking is masterful work.
There wasn’t a single enthusiast in the country that didn’t know what was going on with the ride. Even the general public had a much better idea than you’d expect when a ride is being built and it’s all down to that excellent marketing campaign. The creation of characters, the Phalanx and Nemesis herself were all done justice.
Fast forward to 2024 and the marketing is coming to a close, we know what the new beast will look like, we know what the new story is (to some extent) and excitement for the rides return is at an all time high.
Opening day arrives on the 16th of March 2024 and people are talking about camping out to get as close to the front of the queue as they can. The park opens and 5 hour queues form to get onto the new ride as we’ve all missed it in the last year.
Only 90 minutes when I queued!
I wasn’t in the first 5 hour queue, I got to the area to see what else had been done around Forbidden Valley. I knew that they’d replaced the original Nemesis cannon with a helicopter and I wasn’t that enthusiastic about the change but getting into the area and seeing that first instantly changed my mind. It’s massive!
It’s one of many changes through the area to bring Forbidden Valley and the Phalanx Research facility to life, and in my opinion, make it a world class area now.
The area isn’t just Forbidden Valley and the ride area isn’t just Nemesis, it’s now the Phalanx Research facility and the Nemesis containment area and the little details really sell it. The signage for the containment area is all twisted and bent, as though something large has pulled at the signs and almost attacked them.
Then there’s the station. My god, the station. It’s been overhauled and tidied up, and new effects added. Inside the station platform now resembles the innards of the Nemesis beast, with what looks like ribs and viscera all over the ceiling. The outside looks incredibly smart and the biggest new feature is the eye.
This appears to be a curved screen that loops animations of Nemesis’ eye and it gets angry as the train passes by and vents smoke onto the train. This looks visually impressive and because of the trains design, it pulls the smoke across the top of the station, adding even more to it!
The queue line has been moved around a little and has a large, if unaspiring looking canon built into it that ‘fires’ at the train as it passes by the first corkscrew. I say fires, but it’s just a sound effect and the canon is a little on the plain side compared with other parts of the queue line.
There’s also a container in the queue that belongs to a group of Nemesis sympathisers that want the beast setting free as they feel it should be left to its own devices and they claim the Phalanx are up to no good.
It is heavily implied that the Phalanx are now conducting experiments on the beast and forcing it to lay eggs that can be turned into weapons. What I got from all this is that they’ve lost control and are now panicking and are trying to save themselves from the wrath of Nemesis as well as those that would find out what they’ve been up to!
It’s very sinister and almost feels like it should be part of X Sector. Even the new Forbidden Valley sign feels very X Sector, but I won’t be complaining in the slightest!
As for the ride itself, it is still Nemesis. It does have a little of the iconic roar as it bounds around the layout, it is nice and intense where it used to be and it’s comfortable. The only issue, and it’s a fairly big one, is that the trains seemed to have developed a rather annoying bounce to them. It almost judders around certain parts and I hope this can be rectified in time as it’s about the only negative I can give for the ride!
Otherwise, John Burton has done John Wardley proud, his team have taken what Mr Wardley started 30 years ago and improved on it in almost every way possible in my view. Merlin have shown what they can do and I really hope Alton Towers gets even more of the good stuff in the years to come so they can thoroughly cement themselves as the UK’s premier theme park and a world class destination.
From left to right Me, John Burton, Tracy and John Wardley
So I feel the blog took a massive back seat last year thanks to YouTube and I hope to get back to writing about our exploits more regularly this year! So what better way to start than by having a brief run through of the season ahead.
Starting off, there’s the new additions to the UK, of which there are 4 main attractions to talk about:
Nemesis Reborn at Alton Towers
Hyperia at Thorpe Park
The ‘Intamin Launch and Lift Coaster’ at Drayton Manor
Minifigure Speedway at Legoland
I’ve also listed them in order of preference where Nemsis is my most anticipated addition this year. Hyperia is certainly the more impressive looking machine but I think it’ll be too short to take the top spot from Nemesis this year. I don’t think it’ll even be the best coaster at Thorpe Park as it currently stands!
Then there’s the new coaster at Drayton Manor, the so called ‘lift and launch’ coaster. I do like the idea that this will possible have spinning trains on it and the photos coming out of the new attraction do look good, if a little lacking in height and length so far. I suppose I should also mention Shockwave’s changes too. I don’t think it should be put along side the other 4 as its just a new train, name and some theming, and I really don’t agree with the changes myself but it might be fun!
Finally there’s Minifig Speedway at Legoland. I think this one will be a bit of a sleeper hit to be fair. As it currently stands, I think it’s the one I’m looking forward to least as its competition is just more appealing, but given how Velociraptor manages to be thrilling and quite fun, as well as it being Legoland, it may very well surprise us all!
Then there’s the events we plan to visit this year too. We’ve already booked to go to Oakwood in July as part of the Your Experience Guide event. I couldn’t turn this one down as they hosted the first event we ever went to last year and it’s at Oakwood, a park I’d like to get back to and ride Megafobia and Speed to death.
Love2Explore are also working on events too, as are Attraction Source, so a few more events on the cards with these guys too!
This year, Merlin have decided to scale back their park events, which I think is a bit of a misstep myself. Yeah, sure, Festival of Thrills wasn’t the best last year, but Mardi Gras seemed to do well, same with Carnival at Thorpe Park. I hope this means that the money saved will be invested in making Oktoberfest, Scarefest/Fright Nights and the fireworks the best they can be!
Our European excursions don’t seem to be stopping this year either, with the hopes that we can get to Denmark for Legoland Billund, Lego House, Bakken and Tivoli Gardens. We also have a rough plan in to visit Bellewaerde, Bobbejaanland, Movie Park Germany, Walibi Holland, Hansa Park and Heide Park on a road trip if we can.
We’re also due to visit Efteling and Toverland this month. We’re going for Tracy’s birthday as well as taking a couple of friends along for a sort of honeymoon trip. And yes, Baron 1898 is due to be running this time around so I can’t wait for that! There’s also the fully finished Avalon area at Toverland too.
All of this pales in comparison to the park and attraction that I’m most excited for this year, Europa Park and their newest coaster, Voltron. Europa Park is a park I’ve heard so much about and it’s all good stuff. Voltron looks like they tried to cram as many elements into a coaster and it looks insane because of it!
This is Alton Tower’s first event this year and the second time we’ve had the Festival of Thrills. In this blog, I’ll compare it to last years event, see what worked and what didn’t and give my verdict.
As it’s The Smilers 10th anniversary this year, Alton Towers have branded this years Festival of Thrills as The Smiler Takeover. This means the Ministry of Joy, a fictional group who are behind the construction and running of The Smiler, are out and about and have invaded certain parts of the park. The interactions we had with the staff were great and they really did keep in character, coming across as reassuring and blatantly fake, in line with The Smilers story. They were very well acted!
As for the park itself, there were several displays dotted about each of the big roller coasters were the ministry were conducting tests to find new and interesting ways to being back peoples smile, such as terrifying them on Th13teen, or measuring excitement levels on Rita. You couldn’t interact with the scenes as they were static, and it would have been nice to see some lights or sounds on at least one of the displays! There was also a stamp collecting element, where each ride had a stamper that is used to emboss a card you pickup at any of the stations or at the park entrance. Once you’ve got all 6 (from the 6 big coasters) you can post yourself on social media with it for a chance to win an overnight stay in the resort hotel.
Over in X-Sector is where the bulk of the event was taking place. There were 3 shows to watch, Meet the Ministry, The Ministry fear Test and a karaoke show. We didn’t see the Meet the Ministry show as we were in the wrong place at the wrong time, but we did see the Fear Test and Karaoke shows. The Fear Test was pretty decent as it put a chosen subject through a series of daft tests designed to raise their fear levels and earn them a one way trip to The Smiler. The actors were entertaining and kept in character very well. I really liked the fact that once the tests were done, the test subject received The Smiler fast track tickets which was great to see!
As for the karaoke show, it was very cheesy and maybe a little bit lacking on quality. It wasn’t so bad it’s good, or so bad it’s terrible, just somewhere in between in my opinion! some of the songs being sung were linked in subtle ways to the event though so that was something.
Outside of the event, we got our first ride on Twistatron, the parks newest Retro Squad ride. This is a self built trabant/wipeout style ride but the seats face out from the centre. The ride took ages to load and unload and when we got on, it was actually quite good fun until it got properly going as the seats and restrains mean that the ride simple feels like its trying to throw you out. Usually this is a good fun element to rides but here, it just felt uncomfortable. Thankfully Alton Towers don’t run these rides at full speed for long so it was still enjoyable. On the fair circuit however? I wouldn’t want to ride knowing it would run faster and for longer.
Spinball Whizzer was finally up and running (which was actually it’s first day this season). It’s had a bit of an overhaul so I’ve read, and if so, then it is noticeable! The first thing we noticed were the restraints are now very tightly locked in place. This wasn’t so much an issue for me, but it was for Tracy. She ended up having to take her coat off and ride the ride cross legged in order for the restraint to close far enough. I think this is a bit overkill as we’ve never had anything like that issue before on Spinball or Dragons Fury at Chessington. I hope they relax this just a tad as Tracy said it’ll be a ride she won’t rush to go on in future because of this.
It’s not all doom and gloom though as a positive change seems to be that the break runs now longer jolt the car as they pass through. When we rode it, we sailed through all the break runs and it made for a much better experience! The final break run is still quite abrupt, but you can prepare yourself for that one much easier.
Other than those two rides, there wasn’t that much to talk about. The Smiler was running great and queues were quick, Th13teen was the same and The Curse at Alton Manor ran nice and smoothly today too.
Overall it was a good day, but the event was definitely lacking somewhat. I’ve seen a lot of criticisms about the event online and some are daft, while others I agree with! I feel that they didn’t quite take the takeover far enough and it felt a bit like the scenery around other rides was an after thought, though the park wide audio was great. Another criticism is the lack of event specific merchandise, or at the very least, something to commemorate The Smilers birthday! I’d have loved a pin badge or t-shirt to take home but unfortunately, there wasn’t anything for us!
How does it compare to last year? Well I certainly thing last years was better myself. The music used for The Smilers stage last year fit much better, and the Festival of Thrills was overall a bit better quality than this years offering. It’s a shame as I was quite looking forward to it, what with it being The Smiler themed and The Smiler being my top coaster (currently). I hope we see something come out through the season to commemorate this great attraction.
Overall, we still had a great time but it just could have been a little better here and there!
I’d like to preface this review with two things, firstly I really liked Duel and never rode the original Haunted House. Secondly, I’ve only ridden The Curse at Alton Manor twice, so I might not have seen everything the attraction has to offer.
With that being said, The Curse at Alton Manor is a great ride, but not perfect. The ride takes place inside the same show building that Duel (and The Haunted House before it) used and follows the same track layout. The biggest difference between Duel and Curse at Alton Manor is the lack of guns, so no shooting this time around.
The set pieces use a few of the old Duel props such as the walls that move, giant spiders, a few smaller props as well as the old trommel tunnel which now works properly. Otherwise there are a lot of new props built into entierly new scenes. I’m not going to spoil anything that goes on in any of the scenes as it’s best ridden without know what’s coming, but I will say there is one effect mid ride that gives Hex a run for its money with how it messes with your orientation!
The story of the attraction is that Emily Alton lived with her parents at Alton Manor and on new year’s eve of 1892 a storm hits the house and supposedly kills everyone with Emily disappearing. The preshow tells you all this and then goes on to have Emily tell you exactly what happened. I’ll leave that for you to see as it’s a great preshow in itself.
The first time we rode it, I got off thinking that I did enjoy it but it was little bit overhyped. There are some great effects used in the attraction and the story is excellent but the ride itself seems to run a bit poorly. Our first ride kept stopping and I didn’t know whether it was part of the ride or not. Our second run was much better as the car continues to move throughout the ride and didn’t stop once, but I noticed that some scenes didn’t play the same as they did earlier. Now I hope this is intentional as this makes the ride very reridable and I hope it’s not the case that the attraction wasn’t working correctly.
It’s difficult to say how I truly feel about The Curse at Alton Manor as I didn’t get off with the same kind of excitement as I did when I first got off Gangsta Granny or Hex but I much prefer the story and set pieces of The Curse at Alton Manor. I really, really enjoyed Duel and I think that’s what makes it so difficult to say if it’s good or great when compared with Duel or the other dark rides I’ve mentioned. It’s definitely good and I can’t wait to get back on it but I wasn’t blown away with it like a lot of people have been. I think this one will certainly take a few rerides to fully take it all in and help me properly make up my mind!
The area outside the ride is great though as it now features live actors and props that really add to the charm of the attraction. The same can be said for the shop as you exit. This has had a good bit of attention and is inkeeping with the ride and area’s theme so you never lose the immersion of being in the Alton Manor during the events of the curse.
We’ll be back in a couple of weeks for Festival of Thrills and I’ll make sure to have another ride or two to try and cement what I feel about the ride. It took a few rerides of Flight of the Sky Lion to fully appreciate that, so maybe it’s the same here. For now though, I enjoyed The Curse at Alton Manor and look forward to trying it again throughout the season!
Such a long title for a blog, and a long day too! This was our first ever theme park enthusiast event and was hosted at Alton Towers and put together by the fine fellows at Your Experience Guide(YEG) (Formally Pleasure Beach Experience).
The day started off early at 8am where we all congregated around the turnstiles of Alton Towers, we were checked in and greeted by the YEG team and given our event lanyards and passes. Once we’d gotten sorted, we just stood around and took in what was going on before eventually noticing Loops and Donuts, someone who I’ve been messaging back and forth with on Facebook and was excited to finally meet! We accompanied each other throughout the day and we had a right laugh, so thanks very much for that folks!
Once Alton Towers were ready for us, we went though bag checks and followed the YEG team to Wicker Man for the first of our two sessions of Exclusive Ride Times (ERT) for the day. Exclusive ride times are blocks of time set out, usually outside park hours, to allow complete takeover of a ride or attraction. In our case we were given ERT on Wicker Man from 9:00-10:00 and Oblivion from 18:30-19:30. In this hour, you just keep riding and riding as much (or as little) as you like and it was fantastic! Not only did we get to essentially pick whatever row we wanted, but also the trains were filled with likeminded individuals who were waving at everyone and just generally creating a real buzz of an atmosphere. Such a great time, and this was only the first part of the day!
Once our ERT had ended, we moved onto the shop to see what new merchandise was available this year. I was a bit disappointed to find very few things in 2XL sizes. Because of this, I ended up with a couple of pairs of socks and about 10 pin badges. These were priced at £8 a piece which I think is incredibly expensive, but I had set aside money for T-shirts and hoodies that I couldn’t buy so badges will do nicely.
Next we made the long trek over for our first ride on The Curse at Alton Manor, the reimagining of Dual in Haunted Hollow. I will be doing a blog going into detail of what I liked and disliked, and my overall impression of the ride but for now I’ll say that it was a great ride with some really unexpected sequences! Look out of the new blog here when I write it!
Galactica was our next stop and the ride was suffering a little from a breakdown which meant we ended up queuing for a bit longer but once they cleared the issue, we had a good ride on the old flyer. There does seem to be a little bit of attention being given to Galactica, as it has had some new decals placed about and tidied up a bit. It still could do with a good paint or cleaning, and the tunnel is still very bare, but a good ride nonetheless.
Now we’d finished up with Galactica, we headed over to the Skyride to find that it was closed, and had been all day, so we made the long walk through the gardens towards Dark Forest to see what was happening with Rita and Th13teen. After seeing the queues and noticing the time we decided to have dinner at Burger Kitchen, ride Flavios Fabulous Fandango and head over to Katanga Canyon for the second part of the event, an unofficial takeover of Congo River Rapids at 3pm.
Though not the same as our ERT earlier, this takeover saw the whole group join the queue for Congo River Rapids with the general public and have a right laugh doing so! The boats were being filled, ours had the full 7 in and we barrelled down the course, getting wet and having a few good bumps along the way. This is definitely the best way to ride the rapids!
Next stop was another unofficial takeover, this time on Curse at Alton Manor. This gave us ample time to not only compare it to our earlier ride, but also see things we missed the first time.
The next part of our event was at 18:30, so that left us with about 3 hours to fill, so we headed back up to Runaway Mine Train for a ride on the classic coaster. The area and theming has seen a good tidying up and the entrance looks brand new again thanks to a lick of paint and some sprucing up! It still rides the same as it always has, and it was a squeeze to get into the cars, but we managed and a fun time was had by all.
Our next stop was back over in Dark Forest for a ride on Th13een and Rita. Th13teens queue line has seen a lot of the trees and bushes cleared away, opening it up a bit and you can even see the coaster as it does the outdoor section in the forest. I quite like that you can see this, but it is also a shame that it doesn’t look so overgrown and supernatural now. A back row ride for us which was great fun!
Our next stop was Rita but this ended up being our last stop for the day as when we entered the queue, an announcement was made that Rita was experiencing technical issues but we stayed in queue as there was still another 35 minutes of park time left. By the time it came to 5:45 however, the staff informed us that the engineering team still hadn’t arrived and by the time the arrived, fixed and sent test cars out, it would be after 6pm, so we headed into X-Sector for the Smiler Shop (as the Smiler was also having issues).
The Smiler shop was the same story as earlier unfortunately. Lots of great merchandise to buy, but nothing at all in 2XL here. Now I’m not sure if I should be asking whether they have things in my size, or whether they just don’t get as many lines in 2XL as they used to, but I hope we see more larger sized apparel!
With the Smiler shop being our last stop, the final part of our day was an ERT on Oblivion. It was scheduled to run from 18:30 until 19:30, however there were technical issues that meant the ride wasn’t ready in time. However we weren’t left to be bored as the ride operators, specifically Kian (I think that was his name) had us playing a game where you have to try to catch the finger of the person next to you while the person on the other side does the same to you. Great fun and loads of people interacting keeping the atmosphere positive whilst things were fixed in the background.
Shuttles did eventually start raining down the Oblivion track, so they allowed us on at around 18:50 and our hour started from then which was great to hear! I don’t remember exactly how many rides I got on Oblivion, somewhere around 8, but each one was fantastic and really showed me how much fun Dive coasters are. I usually overlook Oblivion as a one and done sort of affair, but I had a lot of fun doing back to back rides on it, made all the more fun by Tracy, Loops and Donuts and the rest of the crowd!
At this point I would like to mention the staff at Alton Towers as every single person we spoke to seemed interested in our day and our wellbeing. We were constantly checked if we were having a good time, and it never felt forced either. The staff always felt as though the actually had an active interest in your day and conducted themselves professionally and were very welcoming!
Finally I do want to thank all the folks at Your Experience Guide for making the day run as smoothly as it did and put on an excellent event! From greeting us at the start of the day, to keeping us informed throughout and even just shaking my hand and thanking us for coming at the end of the day, it all added onto a very memorable visit to Alton Towers! The same can be said for Loops and Donuts too. As I mentioned earlier, we spent the whole day together and we thoroughly enjoyed their company (and I think they did ours too!) Thanks again for a great day, and hopefully see you on our travels in future!
Photo taken by Paul Young and used with permission (Featured image too)
Recently I’ve been seeing more and more people voicing their opinions and concerns over the Retro Squad at Alton Towers, and I thought I’d put my thoughts out there too.
To be completely blunt, I think they’re good and certainly do their intended job of helping with capacity. Don’t get me wrong, it would definitely be better if Alton Towers got some permanent, well themed flat rides instead, but the Retro Squad are a good second best.
I like that they have at least put some effort into making them more than just bog standard fairground attractions. They all have proper names and their frames are covered over with boards to make them look a bit tidier. They even have a little back story that they come from an alien planet and are summoned to assist. They do lean a lot on the 80s Transformers idea but I think it works well. If Michael Bay can make vending machines turn into Transformers, then Merlin can make park attractions!
The most recent Retro Squad ride, Twistotron seems to have had the most exposure as it has its own video showing how it’s been corrupted by some form of evil transformer, which I would read into it being some sort of villan. My hopes are that it is run at full power and shows off how fairground attractions are run, as the other Retro Squad rides are run a lot slower than they would be if they were at a local fair.
Roller Disco is a prime example of this. Its a standard Waltzer but is run slower so you barely spin at all. I’ve only ridden it once, and I enjoyed it as I find waltzers make me ill if they spin too fast, then stop, then spin too fast again. Roller Disco was a nice change as it didn’t make me ill at all, however I know many people have differing opinions, Tracy included!
Mixtape in June 2021
Mixtape was a great little ride that if repainted and themed up a little would have been a decent ride to permanently fit into X-Sector. I don’t think Spinjam fits as well as what Mixtape did but still has that sort of sinister look to it that could work, at least a little!
Spinjam in 2022
The other ride is over in Forbidden Valley being Funk n’ Fly. This is a standard Super Trooper attraction and I don’t really have any feelings for it at all. It possibly could fit a little in with Galactica I suppose but only very loosely!
This year’s offering is Twistotron, a Trabant style, self built attraction that usually tours around Scottish funfairs and is placed on the site where Enterprise used to sit in X-Sector. I haven’t ridden this one as yet but I don’t think it is best suited for X-Sector. It would have fit a little better in Dark Forest or even on a plot of land by Spinball Whizzer to give that ride some backup.
I suppose really, my opinion is that they work well enough, they could be better and some would be better placed in other parts of the park.
I’ll definitely agree with the masses that Alton Towers needs some really good flat rides but what I don’t agree with is that funfair rides have no place in a theme park. Chessington is just about to open a new Jumani themed area and it’s two supporting rides are both things I would see at every funfair out there. A junior Miami Wave and a Super Jumper ride are both funfair attractions that are themed up to fit the area. Then there’s Ripsaw and Rameses Revenge. Though neither of these currently exist, they were both static installations of rides that are capable of touring the fair circuit. I could go on and on but I think I’ve started to make a dent in my point!
The point is that most people seem to jump in them for being funfair rides. Rides that have no place in a theme park. Rides that aren’t wanted and other things should be put in their place. Yet no one suggests any alternatives or even takes into account how many flat rides out there are perminant versions of touring rides (Mamba Strike, Ostrich Stampede, Vortex or Wave Swinger).
I think the new Intamin Dynamic Motion Stage would fit great in at Towers, or if that’s more of a dark ride then a Zamperla Energy Storm or Blendez, or how about a Technical Park Aerobat or Gerstlauer Sky Fly?
There are many different rides out there, and I bet a couple of the ones I’ve mentioned will end up on the touring circuit.
As for Retro Squad? Let’s just enjoy what we have, let Alton Towers use them to their advantage and hope that we start to see replacements for Ripsaw, Energiser, Submission and Enterprise in the near future!
There are plenty of rides in the UK offering new and exciting ways to thrill you. The smiler can send you upside down 14 times, Stealth can launch you to 80mph in 1.8 seconds and Odyssey can take you to heights no inverted coaster in the UK gets close to. However sometimes you have to look to the past for something new to thrill you.
Step in Wicker Man. At the time of writing, this is Alton Towers newest attraction. A wooden rollercoaster manufactured by Great Coasters International, themed to a cult worshipping a Wicker Man and sending you as sacrifices to feed the flames!
It stands at 22m (72.2ft) tall, has 795m (2608ft) of track and reaches speeds of 43 mph (70.2km/h) and replaced the much loved Flume attraction. It is marketed as the first wooden rollercoaster to incorporate fire into its theming and the first wooden rollercoaster in the UK in 20 years. The last being Megafobia at Oakwood.
Now I love Wicker Man. I like the theme, I love the ride experience and I particularly enjoy the scent pods they use in the preshow, but there are some much older woodies in the UK that can give the new comer a run for its money! So how does the newest major woodie stack up against its older compadres?
The first I’d like to compare it to is Roller Coaster at Great Yarmouth Pleasure Beach. This is one of 2 scenic railways in the country (the other is at Dreamland Margate) and despite it being over 70 years older than Wicker Man, it still manages to top it’s top speed, reaching 45 miles an hour! Though the ride isn’t quite as thrilling as Wicker Mans’, Roller Coaster is still a great ride and comes in just behind Wicker Man’s biggest competitor, Megafobia.
Megafobia is a Custom Coasters wooden coaster located at Oakwood and is very well received as woodies go. This is the UKs fastest woodie, reaching 48mph (77km/h), reaches heights of 85ft and is 2956ft long. So Megafobia edges out Wicker Man in all categories, though it has no theming at all. When I first started writing this blog in mid 2022, I’d have said that Megafobia was the top woodie in the UK, but Wicker Man is bedding in and feels like it’s getting better and better with every passing season. There is little to split these two in my eyes, but Megafobia does give the more uncomfortable ride, not too harsh at all, but because of that small factor, and the theme difference, I’ve put Wicker Man above Megafobia. Atleast for now!
The next contenders for best UK woodie (that I’ve ridden) are all at Blackpool Pleasure Beach. Nickelodeon Streak, Grand National, Blue Flier and Big Dipper. Blue Flyer is a good little kids ride but not quite in the big leagues and I’d say the same is true for Nickelodeon Streak too. Though Nick Streak has a great layout with loads of hills, I feel it takes them a little too slowly and doesn’t give as much airtime as the layout might suggest! It does slightly edge out the next competitor though.
Next up is Big Dipper. Turning 100 years old this year, this is a classic wooden rollercoaster built by William Strickler. It cost £25,000 in 1922, which would be over £1.9 million today, not bad when compared to Wicker Man’s £16 million!
The ride itself has age related roughness to it, though certainly not the hardest ride at Pleasure Beach. It will throw you into unbanked corners and drop you into the dips with a lot of force. The same can be said of Grand National which is arguably the most hardcore of the UK wooden coasters. If Big Dipper throws you into corners and dips, then Grand National launches you into them. It’s certainly not for the faint hearted and it can feel very intimidating, especially if you’ve ridden Wicker Man first!
I feel that Grand National gives the truest wooden rollercoaster experience as it feels raw and untamed, it’s noisy and rough and good fun to boot. Tracy will tell you it’s horrible, which is somewhat understandable as the ride can assault you as much as it thrills! I do enjoy Grand National, but if Wicker Man is a nice and velvety smooth wooden coaster, then Grand National is a slap in the face followed by a stiff drink. Brutal and yet fun.
There are a few other wooden roller coasters in the UK that I’ve yet to ride, such as Scenic Railway at Dreamland Margate and Antelope at Gullivers Warrington. There’s also Tyrolean Tubtwist at Joyland but I don’t think Tubtwist is of the same type as all the other woodies here. It does have wooden side panelling along the sides of the layout that are needed to help the cars spin and though it is classed as a wooden coaster, but that’s all there is, it hasn’t got a wooden structure or anything else, where all the others I’ve mentioned have.
Antelope looks like great fun and has a decent layout so I’d expect that to rank quite well but since I’ve not ridden it, I can’t rate it unfortunately!
So to summarise, here is the list of how I currently rank all the UK wooden coasters!
This is quite an exciting blog to write as we’ve somewhat finalised our plans for the coming year
This year, as I put down in my 2023 resolutions blog, we were hoping to get across to Europe and thanks to our latest bookings, we now shall be! I’ll go into a little detail later but to start our season, we’ll be at Blackpool Pleasure Beach! We only had 1 trip there last year so it’ll be nice to get back on Big One, Icon and celebrate Big Dippers centenary. We would have been going to Alton Towers for the opening weekend, however…
Next up will be Alton Towers in April for the Your Experience Guide (Pleasure Beach Experience) event. I’m very much looking forward to meeting like minded enthusiasts as well as getting a few rides on Wickerman before the park opens! I’ve never been to an enthusiast event so this will be my first and something I’m very much looking forward to.
Our big trip this will be in Europe as I mentioned earlier. We’ll be going in mid May and our route will take us to 6 different parks and will take us through 4 countries, starting in France, then Belgium, The Netherlands and finally Germany! Our intention will be to take the Eurotunnel across to France then stop the night before visiting Plopsaland De Panne for the first time. Next will be Bobbejaanland then onto Efteling for 2 days, stopping in the Holiday Village Efteling Loonsche Land.
Then we’ll have a day off to see the surroundings and then onto Toverland! Next stop will be Phantasia Land for 2 days, stopping in their Hotel Charles Lindbergh. Finally we’ll visit Walibi Belgium on the way back to the Euro Tunnel and the UK.
All in, we should have the chance to ride up to 42 new rollercoasters, as well as plenty of flat rides and other attractions.
Not only will we be visiting 6 new parks, seeing new sites, eating different food, but I’ll be driving the whole way too. I’m don’t know whether I’m more excited about the chance to drive new roads, seeing new things or the fact I’ll be doing it all with Tracy too.
Not only will we be making a grand tour of Europe, but we’ve also got annual passes for Drayton Manor this year. This is the first time I’ve ever held a park specific annual pass and it’ll supplement our Merlin annual passes too. We intend to visit Drayton Manor for their new events so the annual pass makes financial sense!
We’ll also be threading in visits to all the Thorpe Park events, not only to compare and contrast to last year, but as part of the competition being run by Thorpe Park to have a chance to be the first to ride Project Exodus when that opens! I won’t be able to visit every day as we live over 220 miles away, but you have to be in it to win it, so event visits will have to do!
In the autumn, we hope to make a final trip across to France to visit Disneyland Paris and Parc Asterix over Halloween as we’ve been to neither park and want to see both! We will definitely make a concerted effort to get to Fantasy Island for Fear Island again as that was a definite highlight of last year!
Finally, we’ll try to get back to Paultons, Chessington for the new Jumanji area as well as my home park, Flamingo Land, to see how Sik is settling in.
There’s so much to be excited for this year, from trying out Taron and F.L.Y, to Baron 1898, Troy, Fury and The Ride to Happiness! Along the way, I’ll be comparing these to their closest UK offerings, such as Icon being our closest thing to Taron etc. I also can’t wait to see all the themed areas, try out the food, trying to speak German and French again and just having an overall great time this year!
I will, of course, be doing blogs for each visit and possibly trying out video logging (Vlogging) for some, starting with the Alton Towers event in April!
Alton Towers is set well into the Staffordshire countryside amongst the ruins of the famous Alton Towers stately home. In this guide, I aim to give my own tips and suggestions of how to get the most out of a day at Alton Towers, from arriving at the park, to food options and advice!
Arriving
There are two main ways to get to the park, by car and public transport. No matter how you arrive at the park, I would definitely suggest getting there between 9:00 and 9:30. This gives you time to do toilet breaks before you enter the park, go through security checks before the main gates and get into the park.
Arriving by Car
The monorail (red) runs between the entrance plaza and main car park
The park is accessed via road through the village of Alton or Farley and has a lot of twisting country roads, some of these can be quite tight so take your time. You’ll have 2 car park options, the first of which is right by the front gates called express parking, but costs a bit more than standard. The second is using the general car park which is cheaper, but does require a 15 minute walk up to the front gates, or waiting for the parks Monorail, which starts running at 9am. (Though it can sometimes start running late so the walk can be quicker)
Car parking charges are as follows:
Standard car parking is £7 (free if you hold a gold (previously premium) or platinum Merlin Annual Pass)
Express Car Parking is £19 (but is reduced to £12 for passholders)
Blue Badge Disabled parking is also charged at £7 but is located next to the express car park (included with Gold or Platinum passes too)
Main Car ParkExpress and disabled car parking
Public Transport
The bus stop is highlighted here in white
The other way to access the park is by public transport. This is unfortunately something I have never done as we live too far away for it to be a viable way to get there. There is a bus stop on site right by the main entrance and has buses that go between Stoke on Trent, Nottingham, and Derby.
Taken from the Alton Towers website, you’ll want the X41 if travelling from between Stafford – Uttoexeter – Alton Towers, 32X which is between Hanley – Cheadle and Alton Towers, or the X52 which runs from Nottingham, Derby and the Alton Towers Resort.
The closest train station is Uttoexeter, but there is also Derby and Stoke on Trent which are well connected too. Do take into account that you’ll need about 30 minutes if coming from Uttoexeter by bus, 1 hour if coming from Derby, and about 25 minutes from Stoke on Trent (though this would be by taxi).
Park Entrance, Turnstiles and Towers Street
Google maps view of Towers Street
The park entrance is home to the famous Corkscrew rollercoasters’ Corkscrews as a static welcoming display, as well as the monorail station, toilets in the corner and security.
It is advised to arrive with as little as needed, but I generally turn up with a bag full of cameras, food and supplies, and I get through security quite quickly. Once you’ve gotten through security, you’ll be getting to the turnstiles, here you’ll scan your pass or tickets and be into the a park!
The first area you’ll encounter is Towers Street and has a few food and beverage outlets towards the bottom. You’ll also find toilets, lockersguest services at the very top by the entrance to the right. Next down is the resort box office. Here you’ll be able to buy photo passes, ride fast passes and various upgrades to your visit. The box office tends to get very busy at the end of the day as people try to sort out photo passes and digital photos, where guest services gets very busy at the start of the day with ride access passes and queries.
Towers Street during the annual Scarefest event
Ride access passes are another element of Alton Towers, and the wider Merlin group, that I have no information about as I’ve never used them. Thought gist seems to be that they are designed for guests who need extra assistance or can’t queue for extended periods of time . This isn’t the same as fast passes though, so do take this into account. You’ll be given more information when you apply for it than I ever could so click here to find out more about it!
The final stop on Towers Street is Towers Trading, the resorts shop. Here you’ll find all sorts of merchandise, ranging from gloves and socks, to T-shirts, ride resins, pin badges, prints and more! I do advise visiting the shop early as they do allow you to leave your purchases behind to be picked up later on which will save a lot of time as the stop gets busy as the park closes. You’ll need to leave a few details and keep your receipt too!
Towers Trading, the parks shop
Planning your day
There are a fair few themed areas with attraction in each.
Towers Street with shops and guest services
Forbidden Valley where Nemesis (closed for 2023), The Blade, Funk n’ Fly and Galactica reside.
Dark Forest with Rita and Th13teen.
X Sector is home to The Smiler and Oblivion, Twistotron and Spinjam
CBeebies land has all the childrens rides.
Gloomy wood is a walk through area that connects The Curse at Alton Manor(the parks dark ride) to Mutiny Bay.
Mutiny Bay is home to Wicker Man, Heave Ho and Marauders Mayhem
Katanga Canyon, home to Runaway Mine Train and Congo River Rapids.
The World of David Walliams is where you’ll find Gangsta Granny The Ride, Raj’s Bouncy Bottom Burp and Flavio’s Fabulous Fandango.
Assuming you’ve arrived early and gotten through the gates by around 9:30 or so, head straight to either Wicker Man or the Dark Forest. When we go, I usually get to Wicker Man first as the queue starts to form before the rides open at 10am (something in the enthusiast community known as a rope drop). Beating the rope drop means you’ll start waiting for a ride before the ride opens, lessening your time used during park opening hours, if that makes sense?
Wicker Man – The parks most recent coaster
The reason I suggest Wicker Man and Dark Forest is because Wicker Man gets busy and stays busy all day, so less time lost waiting for it, is more time trying other attractions. Dark Forest on the other hand is a good walk away from the entrance so not many people head there, meaning you’ll be able to ride Th13teen and Rita without waiting much at all.
If you started at Wicker Man, your next best stop would be Katanga Canyon, then The Curse at Alton Manor, then onto Forbidden Valley. If you started in the Dark Forest, then you’d be better going to The World of David Walliams, then using the Sky Ride to get over to Forbidden Valley.
The Sky Ride usually opens around 11am and will take you from Towers Street to Forbidden Valley, and then to Dark Forest, and back again.
The Skyride.
The rides that tend to have lower queues throughout the day are:
Hex (more on this later)
Heave Ho (a rocking tug boat ride in Mutiny Bay)
Marauders Mayhem (themed tea cups in Mutiny Bay)
Battle Galleons (a splash battle ride which can get busy if the weather is warm and dry)
Flavio’s Fabulous Fandango (a twister ride in The World of David Walliams)
The Royal Carousel (a carousel set in The World of David Walliams)
Raj’s Bouncy Bottom Burp (A junior frog hopper ride also in The World of David Walliams)
Most of CBeeBies land is busy until around dinnertime when it starts to quiet down, so if you’re heading there, I’d wait until later on in the day. Notable rides here are Octonauts, Postman Pats Parcel Post, Get Set Go Treetop Adventure and In the Night Garden Magical Boat Ride (all of which can be enjoyed by anyone, not just the kids!)
All the main roller coasters will be busy during the day, though The Smiler and Wicker Man usually have the longer lines. Galactica is hit and miss as to whether that gets too busy, though it will be alone in Forbidden Valley for the 2023 season so it might see more riders, therefore longer queues! Oblivion can also get busy, but usually runs many trains and therefore gets through guests quite quickly too.
Rita and Th13teen (if not done early) can get busy, usually around the 45 minute mark and Th13teen also won’t run in any rain at all, so it might be worth riding it early if you know rain is on the way. Finally there’s Runaway Mine Train, which has quite a high capacity, but can sometimes get very lengthy queues, especially if its running more than 2 laps of the track.
One of the biggest suggestions I have for visiting Alton Towers is making sure you’re not losing time by walking long distances back and forth between areas. The app will certainly help you here as it allows you to see what rides have what queues in real time so you can head to or avoid certain areas.
The app showing live queue times (all closed as the park isn’t open currently!)
The Sky Ride is also a great transport option, so if you do start in Dark Forest, you can use it to get all the way back to Wicker Man and the Mutiny Bay area, or stop off at Forbidden Valley. The choice is yours as each day is different so its impossible to say for certain what an optimal route through the park will be every time you go.
One final thing to note is that queue lines close at the parks advertised closing time, but the rides don’t. So if you wanted to have a go on The Smiler buy have been waiting all day for a smaller queue, it might be worth waiting until last thing, joining the queue and guaranteeing a ride. For the last ride of the day, I do suggest Wicker Man or The Smiler due to their lengthy queues throughout the day and neither one should be missed if time allows!
On a side note, if you are reading this and just starting out as an avid thrill seeker, it’s worth mentioning that rides run differently depending on the time of day you ride them. They need to warm up, and a properly warmed up roller coaster will run slightly faster than one that’s taking its first circuit for the day. Wicker Man, The Smiler, Nemesis (when it reopens) and Rita are all worth a few different rides to see how they compare!
It might also be worth leaving Forbidden Valley until the end of the day as there’s a gate by Galactica’s portal that opens up straight to the car park saving you a long walk or waiting for the monorail.
Food Options
Alton Towers has plenty of different food options, ranging from takeaway hotdogs and snacks, to steaks, gourmet burgers and chicken.
We usually alternate between Burger Kitchen, which is at the back of the park by The World of David Walliams, Pizza and Pasta Buffet in Katanga Canyon and Just Chicken in X Sector. Though if you want to get as much done as possible, I would suggesting bringing your own food options and eating whilst in a queue to minimise downtime.
Last year we visited the park with a friend who has a vegan centric diet and we found that offerings were a bit thin on the ground, so it might be worth bringing your own if you have specific dietary needs. Each venue we looked at seemed to have 1 or 2 vegan/vegetarian options which might not suit everyone.
There is also Woodcutters Bar and Grill, which is aimed at healthier eating, and offers things like steaks, hunters chicken, halloumi, a good offering of non gluten meals as well as drinks too.
As I mentioned previously, it is worth bringing along your own food along if you want to get the most out of the day as you can easily lose an hour queing to buy food, then waiting for it to be made and of course eating it. If you do end up eating in the park, eat early or late as the restaurants get busy around the hours of 12 til around 2/3pm, at least from what we’ve seen!
Another thing to consider is if you are going to spend some time eating, it might be worth looking at the Rollercoaster Restaurant in Forbidden Valley (right next to Galactica). At the time I’m writing this, you can’t book for any time before 16:00 but if you’ve ridden all you want to and have worked up an appetite, then Rollercoaster Restaurant is a good stop.
It is the UKs only restaurant of its type and food is sent from the kitchens down tracks to each table. You order using a tablet and each table has a Lazy Susan to allow you to grab your food without getting up. It can be a little pricy, but it is a proper restaurant and worth trying at least once!
A quick overview of the bigger rides
If you’re just starting out as a thrillseeker, or you’re unsure of your ride tolerances, then the best starting ride would be Runaway Mine Train. It has a little force, but for the most part is quite gentle, and has great interaction between guests and the ride operators!
The next coaster up would probably be Th13teen. Though it does have a surprise element, it is best left as a secret and tried for the first time without knowing what’s coming. The ride itself is on the gentler side, but does have a few thrills too! It can’t run in the rain or even light mist as the lift hill uses drive tyres that don’t work as well when its wet.
Next on the thrill scale would be Spinball Whizzer. This is a spinning coaster so depending on your tolerance to spinning, it might be something to avoid at first. It doesn’t always spin very fast, sometimes barely spinning at all but it is a fun little ride and worth a visit! If you want to try it and have as little spinning as possible, try to ride it as a group of 4 where everyone weights about the same. The car will be evenly balanced and shouldn’t spin massively. On the other hand, if you want more spinning, try to put heaving guests on one side of the car and lighter on the other!
Wicker Man would be the next ride along as it is quite a loud and untamed wooden coaster. The theming and ride construction all add to the attraction, and the ride features a preshow to set up the story of the Beornen. If you feel like you want to start off in the middle ground, then Wicker Man is a great start as it offers good thrills and speed, lots of noise, no inversions and overall a good introduction to bigger rides.
Next up is Galactica. This is a very gentle giant and though it looks like a big and scary beast, it is quite the tame ride compared with the ones that follow! You’ll ride this one in a flying position, which sees you sitting down like a normal rollercoaster, but the seats will fold 90 degrees upwards so you’ll be looking at the ground to begin with. It is a unique feeling, especially in the UK but it will have you on your back for parts of the ride, so bare that in mind!
The next two I’d say are on equal footing depending on what you’re into/scared of. These are Rita and Oblivion. Rita is a launched coaster and manages to get from 0-62 in 2.5 seconds which is very thrilling. It’ll then navigate a series of turns before getting back to the station. It only last 55 seconds!
Rita in The Dark Forest.
Oblivion on the other hand is all about fear of heights. Though not actually the tallest rollercoaster at Alton Towers, it does still have the a formidable 180ft drop into the ground. The ride will hold you at the top giving you a chance to look straight down into the abyss before letting you free fall. Much like Rita, once you’ve done the scary bit, the ride is pretty much done so it’s a good taste of what bigger drops will feel like. If you want to avoid seeing the drop, but still want to try out the ride, ask for a back row ride as you can’t really see anything as the train doesn’t move far enough over the drop to the holding brakes.
Finally, the last two are parks signature attractions, Nemesis and The Smiler. Much like Rita and Oblivion, these two are closely matched based on what you might be into.
The Smiler is the parks world record holding inversion machine. It’ll see you turned upside down 14 times and it’s a very thrilling ride. As mentioned earlier, this one always gets longer queues so it’s worth visiting when you have a bit of time spare or as your last ride of the day. The ride did suffer a nasty accident in 2015, as it was all over the news, but since that day, it hasn’t had a single issue at all and is perfectly safe, so don’t let that put you off this record breaker!
The Smiler.
Finally there’s Nemesis. Currently this ride is closed for a major refurbishment so you’ll be unable to ride this I’m the 2023 season, but it’s worth knowing a bit about it before you go! The ride is an inverted coaster, so the track will be above you, unlike the other coasters at Alton Towers (except Galactica). The reason this one ties with The Smiler as top of the thrill chain is because of the forces the ride puts on you. It takes a lot of the elements with great speed and is also one of the very few rollercoasters from the UK to have acclaim abroad! We can’t wait until 2024 for it to reopen, and hopefully you’ll be able to join us there too!
I think I should mention some of the non rollercoaster attractions the park has too, with Hex being one of the most notable. Another ride that’s best tried without knowing what’s coming, this is a story based attraction with a ride section at the end, don’t spoil it for yourself, have a go yourself and enjoy, it’s really good fun!
The Curse At Alton Manor is new for 2023 and is a complete refresh for Duel, the parks interactive dark ride. The ride features a few jumps and scare and is quite family friendly, but may not be entirely suitable for smaller children or guests who fear the dark or don’t like jump scares. It must be tried at least once, as with Hex.
Heave Ho and Marauders Mayhem are both family rides in the Mutiny Bay section and are great for all ages as they are quite gentle and welcoming. Marauders Mayhem, being a themed tea cup ride, does allow you to manually spin your car so it can be quite forceful if you spin it a lot!
Battle Galleons! You’ll probably get wet though!
The park has 2 water rides, Battle Galleons and Congo River Rapids. Battle Galleons will get you fairly wet, where Congo River Rapids won’t so much. Though each ride does have dryers located next to their exits and have additional costs to use them. Though my advice here is to bring additional clothing if you do get soaked, and store it in a locker (or the car if you wanted to save money over saving time!)
Finally there the Retro Squad. These are a set of rides that Alton Towers brought in to help ride capacity. Currently there’s Funk n’Fly, a Super Trooper ride in Forbidden Valley, Spinjam is an Extreme model and Twistotron, a Trabant Style ride that both sit in X Sector. As for riding them, they are all run a lot slower than how they would be a funfairs so it might be better for some, and not for others!
Final few thoughts and tips
Fastrack tickets
This is a bit of a touchy subject with some folk, but I really don’t mind fast track tickets myself. The idea is that if you spend a bit extra, you can drastically shorten down the queue of a ride or multiple rides depending on the ticket you get. Each roller coaster has its own single use fast track ticket and costs £8 -£10 each.
They do also offer packages for the following:
Bronze* is £30 and gets 4 fast tracks on Hex, The Curse at Alton Manor, Spinball Whizzer or Runaway Mine train
Silver* is £50 and gets you 5 fast tracks on Wicker Man, Oblivion, Galactica, Rita, Th13teen or The Smiler
Gold* is £70 and gets you 12 fast tracks on Wicker Man, The Smiler, Galactica, Oblivion, Rita, TH13TEEN, Marauders Mayhem, Battle Galleons, Congo River Rapids, Runaway Mine Train and Spinball Whizzer, Gangsta Granny, Hex and The Curse at Alton Manor.
Platinum* is £110 and gets you on all the same rides as gold but as many times as you like during the day.
*Nemesis has since been removed from all packages and Gangsta Granny and The Curse at Alton Manor have been added.
Refillable drinks
The park offers a refillable drinks cup that costs £15 initially but drops to £8.50 if you bring back your cup and recharge it. There is also a hot drinks version too.
There is also a multi buy option that makes it cheaper the more cups you buy, which I can imagine is better for families. If you buy 2 or more, it’ll cost £14 per cup and 3+ will be £13. Not huge savings, but when a 500ml bottle of coke can cost around £2.80, these can be great value!
You can refill your drinks at any 1 of 16 machines throughout the park, these are located at the following:
Towers Street
Mutiny Bay – By the Welcome Inn opposite Wickerman
Katanga Canyon – By Congo River Rapids
The X sector – Behind Just Chicken
The Dark Forest – Next to Rita’s Photography unit
Forbidden Valley – By the Galactica Lift
Earlier I mentioned lockers and these are located at the very start of the park by the entrance and another set is located by Galactica in Forbidden Valley, some in X Sector and a final set are in Dark Forest. These are priced at
£5 for a small one per day
£10 for a large one per day
There’s also a first aid station located behind Towers Street before the skyride entrance, though this isn’t a facility I’ve ever had to use thankfully!
With that I think this mammoth guide has come to an end. I think I’ve covered everything you could possibly need to enjoy a decent day at Alton Towers! Don’t go with expectations of getting on every ride the first time around, this only happens of you’re very lucky and the park is quiet, but if you set realistic goals to ride the most important rides to you, anything over and above that is a bonus!
For context, the very first time we went to Alton Towers, we went in blind and managed Wicker Man, Nemesis, Galactica, Rita, Th13teen, Oblivion, The Smiler, Runaway Mine Train and Hex if I recall correctly. I did have a £25 fast pass which at the time got me on Nemesis, Galactica, The Smiler and Oblivion as Tracy wasn’t quite up to the big stuff just yet!
Cheat sheet for getting the most of your day
Arrive at the park gates for around 9:30
Head straight to Wicker Man or Dark Forest
Plan next stop based on queue times of next area
Wicker Man and The Smiler will be busy all day
Th13teen can’t run during the rain
Cbeebies land is quieter after 1pm
Bring your own food and eat in queues
Head to The Smiler just before queue lines close (unless it is quieter during the day)
Use the Skyride optimally, if you’re heading to Dark Forest, do The World of David Walliams next
It might be worth doing Forbidden Valley last as the park opens the Galactica gate for exiting to the car park (also the possibility of eating at the Rollercoaster Restaurant)
And there we have it. This has taken quite a while to write and I hope at least 1 person finds it useful! Feel free to reach out and contact me if you have any questions or suggestions around this guide!
Though we haven’t had quite as many brand new attractions to ride this year, we’ve visited more parks and done more events than last year. As with last year, I thought it would be fun to look back at the 2022 season, rank the events and new attractions we rode this year and reflect on the season passed.
The Events
Over the last year we went to the following events:
Alton Towers Opening Weekend
Alton Towers Festival of Thrills
Thorpe Park Mardi Gras
Thorpe Park Carnival
Alton Towers Octoberfest
Chessington Howl’o’ween
Thorpe Park Fright Nights
Legoland Brick or Treat
Alton Towers Scarefest
Fantasy Island Fear Island
Legoland Fireworks Spectacular
Alton Towers Fireworks Spectacular
That list is just in the order we did them, not the order I enjoyed them most. The best event we did this year, at least in my opinion was probably the Alton Towers opening weekend as we saw plenty of other enthusiasts as well as sharing it with a couple of good friends too.
It wasn’t truly an event in the same vein as the others but I included opening weekend as it’s celebrated as such and I enjoyed it!
The most surprising event and probably the second best we did was Fantasy Island’s Fear Island. For such a relatively small park to put on such a good event was staggering and though not everything was a massive hit, the scare mazes definitely were!
The most disappointing event unfortunately goes to Scarefest at Alton Towers. As highlighted in my blog, the event felt a little lacking and missing something special to mark the occasion.
All the other events and visits we had were great, though I did feel that Carnival was just Mardi Gras but with a yellow overlay, but it was still enjoyable none the less!
The Attractions
There wasn’t many new attractions to try this year but we did get around all the ones we could! We managed:
Sik at Flamingo Land
Enso at Blackpool Pleasure Beach
Harrington Flint’s Island Adventure at Fantasy Island
The Guardian at Fantasy Island
Wild River Rapids at Fantasy Island
Farm Yard Flyer at Paultons Park
Vikings at Drayton Manor
Barrel Bailout at Chessington World of Adventures
Trawler Trouble at Chessington World of Adventures
Not a very long list but still plenty to go at!
The best this year, at least in my opinion, was the long overdue Sik at Flamingo Land. Daft name but great ride! Despite it being my home park, we only managed it once and I’ve heard it’s having a few issues as the years gone on but I’ll get back to it next year to see!
The weakest of the new additions is a tie between Enso and The Guardian, a bit of a cop out, however both had issues.
The upcharge and lack of value for money on Enso is what took it away for me. Even then, once you’d paid the fee, I wasn’t blown away by the feeling of free spinning. I followed all the advice people have me such as sitting in the right hand seat and going alone but even still I didn’t get the same levels of enjoyment out of it as other seem to!
Dragons Fury, when sat facing backwards, spins more going into the first break run than Enso did through its whole layout. That ride is probably built with spinning in mind, but it is included in park entry at least.
The Guardian was a good idea that was executed badly. Bad CGI and screen quality hampered an otherwise good idea, especially when you first enter the queue line and see all the theming and effort that’s gone into this attraction.
I’m not sure if it was budget constraints or purposeful decisions that caused the issues but they are somewhat easily rectifiable and should make this attraction live up to the expectation that the queue line builds up!
As for the other new attractions this year, there was Vikings which is a good themed area with a good new ride in Loki. I wasn’t really that blown away by it though. Thor is just another Disk’o Coaster and Jormungandr is still Buffalo Coaster with a new theme. Sleipnir is decent though, especially for younger kids.
The whole area is pleasant to walk through and features a lot of wood and some Viking theming but it could do with a bit of an expansion on the theme in my opinion! It was put together very quickly, especially when compared with some of the other new additions and in the nicest possible way, it shows! Just a bit of fine tuning, a few props here and there and it’ll be spot on.
Another surprise entry was from Fantasy Island with Harrington Flint’s Island Adventure. This was much better than expected. I’m a sucker for interactive dark rides, I think every park should have one and this one stands out from Tomb Blaster, Rootin’ Tootin’ Target Trail, Sheriff’s Showdown, Laser Raiders and Dual because of its use of both screens and physical props. The cars were comfortable and the shooting was fun. It just lacks on ride photos and the physical props adding to your score!
The New Parks
This year we visited a lot of new parks, this includes:
Funland Hayling Island
Crealy
Barry Island
Southport Pleasureland
Joyland
Great Yarmouth Pleasure Beach
Pleasurewood Hills
I think the biggest surprise out of all the new parks we visited, for me at least, was Great Yarmouth Pleasure Beach. The ride selection was great, there were very few queues throughout the day and we had a great time.
Joyland was also a wonderful little park. Though not even a half day park, it was worth our money and time, and I’ll certainly visit here every time I’m back in Great Yarmouth in future!
Crealy was a nice and tidy park, as was Pleasurewood Hills. Both have good ride line ups but in both cases we weren’t the intended audience of the parks, so it wasn’t quite as fun for us as some of the other parks, such as Barry Island or Great Yarmouth Pleasure Beach.
Finally I’d like to mention both the owners of Southport Pleasureland and Barry Island for all their help with regards to filming around their parks and on the attractions!
The New to us Attractions
In this section I’d like to highlight some of the existing attractions that we only experienced for the first time this year. We tried all sorts, ranging from our first scenic railway, a 70 year old virginia reel, weird and wonderful flat rides, all the way up to two different snail attractions!
The biggest standout of the year is most certainly Roller Coaster at Great Yarmouth Pleasure Beach. This is our first scenic railway (of the 2 in the UK and 7 worldwide) and is the second fastest wooden rollercoaster in the country only behind Megafobia. Though not as thrilling as Megafobia, or as well themed as Wicker Man, its definitely the smoothest woodie we’ve ridden and was a joy from start to finish.
Other standout attractions of the year include Lightning 360 at Great Yarmouth Pleasure Beach, Roller Coaster, The Rocket and Ghost Train all from Southport Pleasureland and just because of the sheer amount of spinning we got, I’ll include (what I believe to be Crow’s) Spinning Coaster from Hull Fair too.
There’s one final attraction that was notable this year too, that being Kite Flyer at Pleasurewood Hills. This was the only ride all year that made me feel genuinely ill afterwards! I’m not sure if I was having an off day, the ride cycle was too long or I moved my head too fast while the ride was spinning but it really knocked me for 6.
Summary
We’ve ridden some great attractions this year. Tried some terrible ones too. Had some ups and downs, rainy days and absolute scorchers along the way. Throughout all the visits we’ve had, we’ve always had fun. Yeah Enso was a bit pricy, Sik took far too long to open and Kite Flyer went a step too far (for me at least), but each day was still fun.
We’ve shared at least 3 visits with friends and family this year, I’ve found that one of my best friends, Pedro, is a secret adrenaline junkie and both he and Tami are welcome to join us anytime they like!
I’m not sure there is too much to be excited for in terms of the UKs new offerings next year, but as this year comes to a close, we’ve started drawing up rough plans for our visit next year, with a blog to follow once we know more.
Hopefully next year will be as fun as this year has been but only time will tell!
The Awards
Best New Attraction
Awarded to the best single attraction opened during this year.
Sik
Harrington Flint’s Island Adventure
Loki
Best Event
Awarded to the events that I felt were the best from this year.
Alton Towers Opening Weekend
Fantasy Island – Fear Island
Thorpe Park Fright Nights
Best New Park
Awarded to the park we visited for the very first time this year.
Great Yarmouth Pleasure Beach
Joyland
Crealy
Best New To Us Attraction
Awarded to the attraction that we experienced for the first time this year.
Roller Coaster – Great Yarmouth Pleasure Beach
Ghost Train – Southport Pleasureland
Lightning 360 – Great Yarmouth Pleasure Beach
Best Rollercoaster Overall
Awarded to the top 3 rollercoasters from my ranking page.
The Smiler
Stealth
Nemesis
Best Flat Ride Overall
Awarded to the attraction that I felt was the most fun and enjoyable flat ride from the last year.
Haunted House Monster Party
Detonator: Bombs Away
Zodiac
Best Onsite Stay
There were only two to pick from, but its awarded to the park with the best onsite stay we had through the year.
Thorpe Shark Cabins
Alton Towers Star Gazing Pods
Best Customer Services
Awarded to the park who’s customer services were needed and how well they handled our issues.
Alton Towers
Pleasurewood Hills
Southport Pleasureland
Best Food
Awarded to the park that I think had the best tasting food from the year.
Chessington World of Adventures (Drop n’ Chicken Nuggets)
Alton Towers (Front Lawns Catering)
Thorpe Park (Pizza Pasta Buffet)
Most Disappointing Visit
These are my least memorable visits from the year. Non were bad, just didn’t fully hit the mark!
Alton Towers – Scarefest (Lacked Ceremony for the 15th anniversary)
Oakwood (Rained off with no rainy day return)
Legoland – Firework Spectacular (Too short!)
Worst Ride of the Year
Grand Canyon – Southport Pleasureland
Kite Flyer
Rootin’ Tootin’ Target Trail
Park of the Year
Awarded to the park that, overall, had the most enjoyable visits.
loopsandlapbars.com 