Tag: WIDIIWIC

Blog, Fantasy

Thorpe Park – What I’d do if I were in charge

Loops&Lapbars

During the course of the 2022 season, we visited Thorpe Park a lot. Coupled with 2021s visits, I believe it makes it our second most visited park after Alton Towers. So, much like the Alton Towers blog, I think it would be fun to break down Thorpe park as though I were in charge!

The Good Things

Thorpe Park has some excellent coasters already, Stealth being my favourite there. Then there’s Saw, Swarm and Nemesis Inferno. All of these need very little doing to them at all.

The Walking Dead is a great little indoor coaster, that has great theming but can sometimes fall a bit short when there isn’t any live actors around the show building.

The park itself is also quite compact so getting from The Swarm to Saw takes no time at all, especially when compared with Alton Towers!

I particularly like the Amity area of the park too, its 1950s Americana theme, coupled with the destruction caused by Tidal Wave makes of r an interesting way to theme an area, and its executed very well. The radio station that play sin the area, WWTP is a laugh but also plays some excellent era defining tunes.

The Not So Good

Colossus

Colossus is the first big issue that needs tackling in my eyes. The coaster has recently celebrated its 20th operating season and has direct competition and comparison with Sik at Flamingo Land. Though I don’t feel that Sik will ever over take Colossus as the fan favourite, Sik outclasses colossus in pretty much every way except for theming and landscaping.

As Colossus is well established, the area surrounding it is quite pretty, well planted and a nice place to be. However, some of the theming elements have grown to look a bit tired. Take the cobra roll out for example. There’s plenty of room for a water feature there, and with the UKs weather, the pit usually has some water in it anyway, so why not make this and actual water feature, with fountains and such?

Then there’s the trains themselves. These need replacing as they are nothing like as good as the ones that Sik has. The lap bar restraints offer so much more freedom of movement, open up the train much more and make it much easier to get in and out of. I have read somewhere that Sik’s trains won’t fit on Colossus’ track as the versions are drastically different which would make it difficult but certainly not impossible to rectify! I hope Intamin can do something here.

Access issues aren’t only an issue that Colossus has, Stealth and Rita have the same issues, where the restraints are so bulky that the make it a bit difficult to get in and out of. The difference between Stealth/Rita and Colossus is that Stealth/Rita don’t need you to pass your bags across the train, where Colossus does. Siks trains make this much easier to deal with! Perhaps this issue could be somewhat alleviated by having baggage drop off before the station in someway.

Demographic

Thorpe Park has been through a lot of changes over the years, changing from a family orientated park, to a primarily thrill seeking park. I think this is a good idea myself as there are plenty of parks out there that cater for family’s, plenty that are focused on kids but fewer have a purely thrill seeking audience, especially in the UK. I think they should really try to add a few more thrilling attractions to the park specifically designed for younger audiences. That way the park can remain the thrill capitol of the UK as well as catering for families too. Legoland and Chessington are close enough that they can cover for the families who don’t want too many thrills, leaving Thorpe Park there to cover thrills!

If it were me, I’d be looking to couple together the few smaller attractions currently at the park into their own area, possibly closer to the Thorpe Shark Cabins. Flying Fish and Depth Charge are already ideally located for this, but High Roller could be moved closer to them, along with Mr Monkeys Banana Ride. Thorpe Park recently built a playground for kids right by Depth Charge so I think this makes even more sense.

This would not only make an area of the park that younger audiences could stick to, but would also help to alleviate another issue concerning Thorpe Shark Cabins that I’ll touch on later.

Project Exodus

This will be Thorpe Parks newest coaster, being the tallest in the UK, and possibly also the fastest too. However if I were in charge and I could do what I wanted, I wouldn’t be building exodus in its current form.

The old town section would still be used as the station area, but I’d have gone with a traditional style giga coaster that would really put Thorpe park on the map. Not only to UK guests but to international guests too.

I’d make it at least 300ft tall and have a drop that is slightly longer than that, going under ground for added thrill factor, coupled with a truly monstrous Inversion or two would see this version of exodus dwarf the current offering. I think the current plans look good, but I share a similar feeling with the rest of the theme park enthusiast community in that the proposed ride did initially look a bit underwhelming. I’m sure it’ll be fine of course, but I think a huge out and back would have looked much better myself.

Plus Merlin could get very excited in marketing the UKs first and only Giga coaster. nothing else even comes close to the 300ft height I’d be intending to build, let alone the drop I would have added. Once again though, I think the current Exodus plans will still be thrilling and a good addition, just somewhat lacking as to what they could add. Thorpe Park is, at current, the only park that could realistically add something of this height, assuming planning permission was granted of course!

Angry Birds Land

Angry Birds land sits on a substantial plot of land, has 3 attractions and splits Amity in two, separating Stealth from the rest of the area.

I’d leave the Dodgems where they are, but theme them to Amity instead of Angry Birds, move Detonator away, possibly towards Saw and bulldoze the rest!

The 4d cinema takes up so much space, along with the surrounding buildings that I think this could be better used as free space for permanent stages and show areas. Thorpe park has added a few more events over the past few years, and they lack proper areas to stage their shows, relying on any remaining free space to erect temporary installations.

If Angry Birds land was moved, not only will it bring back continuity between Tidal Wave and Stealth, but it would also allow for a large covered area for their new shows and entertainment to take place. I think the Angry Birds property has somewhat fallen off in recent years and it feels a bit dated too. Though Thorpe Park, and Merlin in general seems to really like IP based areas and attractions as of late.

Storm Surge and Rumba Rapids

Storm Surge is a bit of an eyesore, sticking out in the skyline and not really offering much in return. Rumba Rapids on the other hand was a fun little attraction that has had a lot of the life drained from it with recent incidents on UK rapids rides.

I’d look to remove then completely, and have them replaced with a water coaster. I’d put the coaster over where Rumba Rapids is as that occupies a lot of land so would make for a much more impressive layout, and it keeps it away from Tidal Wave which should be the main focus of the area it’s in.

As for the site where Storm Surge sits, I’d probably put in a flat ride of some description, something that would fit in with the Amity theme, not take up too much space, but have a good capacity for the crowds. As for what I’d put there, I’m not so sure. The first thing that comes to mind is a Waikiki Wave, a variant of the Top Spin model made by Vekoma. I know I’ve already suggested that Flamingo Land bring theirs back, but having a ride that repeatedly rolls over and over, situated directly across from Tidal Waves splash zone makes perfect sense to me!

Thorpe Shark Cabins

The onsite accommodation is decent but not perfect. The cabins are quite small but have enough in them for a basic stay. I’d look to make a permanent hotel with cabins as a budget option, and compliment this with more well equipped rooms for a bit more luxury.

One of the biggest glaring issues is the sheer lack of anything to do after the park has closed. To combat this, I’d leave open the arcade in the centre of the park, as well as having access to the smaller rides I mention earlier, Flying Fish, Depth Charge, High Roller and Mr Monkeys Banana Ride. With these being smaller attractions, they wouldn’t need as much man power to run but would still give guests something to do besides the very lack lustre offerings in the Dome.

Live entertainment could be put on in the new staged area I proposed earlier too, or the Dome could be used for this too as that is under used currently.

Derren Browns Ghost Train

Finally there’s Derren Browns Ghost Train. This attraction needs a lot of work I think. I get the idea behind using VR to isolate you from the outside world but the headsets are very clunky to get on, and I don’t feel offer all that much. The idea is quite good but the execution is terrible and even with a refresh it still doesn’t quite hold up to expectations.

I would look to remove the ride completely and replace it with a really good quality interactive dark ride. I bet no one saw that coming!

To help it stand out from the others in the UK, I’d lean it heavily on the horror theme, like Dual, but dialed up to 11. I’d have it run slower in most places so you can take in the scenes properly, speed the cars up in certain parts to give it a sense or urgency where needed and employ actors as well.

Not only would having live actors make it so they could chose where and when to scare you, but it would also be utilised as a scare attraction during Fright Nights too. If I had to, I’d attach and IP to it, but it would be reluctantly as I don’t think IPs are needed on well themed attractions myself. However if forced to, then possibly Stranger Things would work or go down the route of Dead By Daylight and turn the game into a ride?

Since writing this, Thorpe Park has removed all mention of Derren Brown from the ride and rethemed it to Ghost Train. It remains to be seen what the attraction will run like, but I doubt that it’ll be a huge change from what it was before, but we’ll see. For now, I’ll stand by removing it and putting in something new.

The Little Changes

I’d start by cleaning up Saw as the queue line has gotten very over grown and makes it look a bit of a mess. I don’t think it keeps in with the Saw theme myself as there are plenty of show scenes in the queue line that are slowly getting lost to the wilds!

A full renovation of Zodiac should be done to keep the ride going for as long as possible as Enterprise rides are starting to become quite rare and it would be great to see this ride go completely vertical and look it’s best too. Same for Vortex, Rush and any of the other rides that need it, just a good clean up of their areas and signage.

Stealth’s station could do to be covered over a little; as with Rita, both stations are open to the elements and having a bit of rain protection would be great! The queue line could do with a bit of a tidy up too, but nothing major.

Some of the retail outlets could do with being used or closed down entirely. During our visits this year, we really wanted Mexican food from Sombreros, but it’s never open. Same with Colossus hot dogs over in Lost City, that’s never open too.

I think this might be an overall issue with the Merlin Parks in general and it does mean that expansion is much easier but they seem to build new food outlets into the areas anyway leaving the old ones even less use!

I’d definitely want a better size range for their clothing too. I’m a 2xl and I have never seen any 2xl clothes at Thorpe Park, or Chessington for that matter too. Though they do stock this size at Legoland and Alton Towers, so I’m not sure why Thorpe Park doesn’t have larger sizes.

This is one of my bigger issues as I’d love to buy their t-shirts and hoodies but they just don’t fit so I end up not spending as much in the gift shops. Since I started writing this, Thorpe Park have confirmed that for the 2023 season, they will have larger sizes which is great news!

Conclusion

This has been a substantial break down of Thorpe Park and the way it operates and looks. The park is great as it is but could be so much better in my opinion if some of the above things were changed!

Overall I do enjoy Thorpe Park as it offers some of the top rides in the UK, and though I’ve written substantially more about how the bad things are compared with the good, I’ll still be visiting regularly!

Blog, Fantasy

Alton Towers – What I’d do if I were in charge

Loops&Lapbars

Here’s a big park to tackle with this blog series. Alton Towers.

For me, the park doesn’t really do many things wrong, it has some of the UKs premier attractions such as Nemesis and The Smiler. It’s also been a testing ground for many worlds first attractions such as Air, Oblivion and Th13teen and I’ve personally had some of the best days out here.

That being said, there is still room for improvement. As the park has added new attractions and rethemed areas, it’s caused a few issues here and there with existing rides.

– THE MAJOR CHANGES –

Rita and the Dark Forest

The first big change that really needs addressing is Th13teen and Rita. Poor old Rita gets a lot of flak for its ride duration and theme. When it first opened in 2005 in the Ug Land part of the park, it didn’t really fit, and with the opening of Th13teen and Ug Land becoming Dark Forest, its theme was altered to fit the area.

I actually like the idea that Rita was once a drag racing machine that is now abandoned and used to escape the forest, but I know that not everyone agrees.

To remedy this I’d either take Rita out entirely and sell it onto another park or move it somewhere else in the park so another more fitting ride can occupy its space. As for what I’d put there, I’m not 100% sure!

One idea I’d like to see is an Rocky Mountain Construction (RMC) Raptor coaster, similar in concept to Rita but executed in a much better manor. The ride would be racing away from the creeping vines and roots as Rita once did, but since Raptors are capable of tighter turns, this would lead to a much better experience. The ride would be custom built and heavily themed to really bring the Dark Forest to life!

Failing the RMC, then maybe a really good quality interactive dark ride. Something like Gangsta Granny but with interactive shooting elements and more special effects.

Dark Forest could also do with a permanent supporting ride in place of the current Retro Squad offering. Something like a Chance Rides UniCoaster or even a new type of log flume/water ride to absorb guests.

Galactica

The second issue with Alton Towers is Galactica. Similarly to the issue Rita faces, Galactica doesn’t really fit its area. When it was unveiled in 2002 as Air, the world’s first ‘true’ flying coaster, it didn’t fit with Nemesis in the Forbidden Valley section of the park.

While Ripsaw and The Blade, were both themed to look intimidating and threatening and Nemesis themed to a dangerous monster, Air was themed to be more tranquil and quiet and almost an escape from the terror surrounding you. In 2016 it was updated and transformed into Galactica, with a space flight theme. This still didn’t work and personally, I think this is the biggest mistheming issue that Alton Towers has, more so than Rita.

At least with Rita, the ride is trying to fit in with it being used as an escape vehicle! Air/Galactica hasn’t ever fit in properly with Nemesis or its supporting rides.

So what would I do? I’d certainly not scrap Galactica as I think it would do great in another park, such as Drayton Manor, Flamingoland or Oakwood. In its place I’d put another beast of a ride. Maybe a floorless rollercoaster, another flying coaster, or even a B&M Wing coaster. Name it Vindicator or something similar and have it up to the rider to decide if its themed to attack the Nemesis monster, or to aid it in its destruction!

– THE MINOR CHANGES –

Mutiny Bay and Wickerman

So we’ve tackled Rita and Galactica, next is Mutiny Bay. This area is perfectly fine for the most part but it could be improved so much to fit Wickerman in. All they’d need to do is loosen the pirate theming a little, add a lot more wood and a few fire torches and make it more of a cultist village. Wickerman would fit right in then!

Katanga Canyon

Katanga Canyon is also fine, though I’d give Runaway Mine Train a little attention. I’d turn the tunnel into a properly themed mine, and spruce up Congo River Rapids so the water elements work and maybe add new interactions along the way!

Duel and Gloomy Wood

Working our way around to Duel and Gloomy Wood. I don’t know if Duel could be moved to Dark Forest and rethemed to the dark ride I previously mentioned, or kept here and given a full refurbishment.

Assuming the latter, I’d look at slowing the cars down during most of the ride, overhauling most of the scenes so there is more to look at and shoot. Next I’d give it small coaster elements like a section where the guns aren’t used and the car travels much faster around twists and turns and down hills and such. Really amp up the haunted house strikes back as I do like the idea that the house is actively out to get you and you’re fighting your way through. Air blasts and water jets would be excellent additions in my opinion!

X-Sector

X-Sector is almost perfect. Assuming Enterprise is running and The Smiler and Oblivion are doing their thing then little needs changing here. However, Enterprise is regularly down and suffering quite badly with its age now, so maybe it’s time it was replaced with a newer permanent ride.

For its replacement, I’d go with a Zamperla Gryphon. It has a similar style to Enterprise but offers something different at the same time. Still giving single rider experiences and looking great to boot, but also having good throughput and theming flexibility.

I feel that when Mixtape was in the area that it fit right in (aside its colour scheme). So I’d love to see a permanent version of one of these installed where it initially stood (and Spinjam now occupies). Either that, or one of Zamperla’s Blendez models. These look just right in my mind for X-Sector, and probably aren’t as intense as they look too!

The rest

CBeebees land, Gloomy Wood, Towers Street, World of David Walliams, The Towers and gardens are all absolutely fine as they are. I wouldn’t change anything here. I’d change out Spinball Whizzer for a Mack Spinner, in the same vein as Storm Chaser at Paultons Park, but a little bit more intense.

The Hotels and waterpark are also great, little changes if any needed here too. Extraordinary Golf could use a freshen up, though I’ve heard that they’re in the process of doing so for its 15th anniversary this year.

Finally there’s the car park, monorail and entrance. I think the monorail windows need clearing so you can see the park properly as you travel from the car park to the main entrance.

A new purpose built entrance should be made at the Galactica gate for car park users and hotel guests, with a speedy lane used for hotel guests to keep that special element included in overnight stays.

There was a lot to write about here. Alton Towers is a fantastic park as it currently stands and I’m more than happy to visit with its current ride line up and themes, but I’d love to see it taken to the next level. These are all purely hypothetical ideas that I’ve had, and the probably isn’t anyway an RMC Raptor could be used to replace Rita, or Duel having a huge overhaul, but it’s fun to discuss nonetheless!

Leave any comments down below, start a discussion, lets see what else Alton Towers could do!

Blog, Fantasy

Legoland – What I’d do if I were in charge

Loops&Lapbars

Following on from my recent post about Flamingo Land, I thought it would be fun to tackle one of the UKs bigger parks this time around, Legoland Windsor!

My first ever visit was only last year and I remember being underwhelmed with the overall experience. A subsequent second visit for Brick or Treat vastly improved this and I now rank it much higher!

Anyway, the park in its current state is good. It has some well themed areas, some excellent attractions and a good layout but I think there are a lot of improvements that could be made.

Firstly I think there is a distinct lack of representation for the Technic brand, as well as no mention whatsoever of anything to do with The Lego Movie or Bionicle. The first thing I would do is invest in a new area themed to the Technic line of products which would include a new, more thrilling rollercoaster than the park currently has.

Cobra at Paultons Park, would it work if something like this as themed to Technic?

This new ride wouldn’t be anything too intense but something like Dragons Fury, Rattlesnake, Cobra or Storm Chaser would fit in just nicely so long as the trains were Lego themed with plenty of brickwork models scattered about. If it were me, I’d be looking to Mack, Gerstlauer or Vekoma to install something, whether it be spinner from Mack, Bobsled from Gerstlauer or a suspended thrill coaster from Vekoma.

Other rides in the new area could certainly include a Zamperla Nebulaz or even a Powersplash from Mack. Things that would stand out on their own as additions to the park but also fit well into the Technic theme. This area would be focused on the more thrillseeking guests but still be tame enough for the family market that Legoland dominates.

Other changes would include doing something to Coastguard HQ as we found the ride to be very underwhelming. The boats are very slow even as a family ride, and when you’re out on the water, there isn’t all that much to see. There are some excellent models dotted about and the elephant that squirts water is one of the more memorable ones but other than that, I don’t recall all that much!

The submarine ride and Fire HQ are good, the latter especially as it not only offers a family based, team experience but also does a great job of educating the younger ones about the risks and causes of house fires. Big props here!

The fire engines all lined up ready and waiting!

As for the submarine ride, it’s a great take on the Sealife attraction that most of the Merlin parks have but I feel the windows are too far down and I ended up sitting on the floor to get as much as I could from the attraction and even then, vision was limited! Bigger windows in the subs and potentially make the submarines themselves deeper to accommodate larger windows or have them steadily drop into the tank to allow them to go deeper into the attraction. Otherwise it’s a great and unique attraction here in the UK.

One of the submarines from Deep Sea Adventure. The seats are 3/4 of the way up the windows!

My next biggest gripe with the park is the Sky Rider. That is so under utilised it’s unreal. Why doesn’t it go over and around miniland?! That seems like the perfect use for it, but instead it travels around what is arguably the most vacant part of the park with nothing much to see at all.

Add to the track, have it ride around all of miniland and maybe have an audio track play that gives small facts and figures about miniland’s areas and structures.

Finally the Viking Splash ride needs a bit of work. When both Tracy and Myself got off it we both said the same thing. It’s a proper rapids ride, that really throws water about and bounces you around which is great but the whole area lacks enough theming!

Could we add some Viking markings or runes on that back wall maybe?

The trough is basic concrete and uncoloured and there are a good few Lego models around the attraction but it needs more. It needs a cave or some special effects to bring it into its own and it could also do with building into the hill side a little better as it feels like a bit if an eyesore with how it sticks out and looms over Ninjago World. The ride is good but the execution and theming could be vastly improved!

Overview of Viking River Splash showing the lack of theming!

Other than that, Mythica is excellent. So is Pirate Shores and Knights Kingdom – though I think Knights Kingdom could do with a new ride or two. Miniland is massive but fantastic to walk around and so are the little areas designed to allow guests to just build with Lego.

I’d love to see an area designed purely for the older Lego builders such as Tracy and I who are avid Lego collectors but don’t feel as well catered for. I know it’s a family themed park but I would be nice to see a little more for the older folk!

Merchandising is good as you would expect from Lego and they even have a set based on the actual park. It could do with having a few more of the actual attractions in it but it’s still a great thing to own. T-shirts and the usual merchandise are good though could be improved with ride specific designs like Alton Towers and Pleasure Beach do, but this is a minor thing.

I’d also like to see a pick a brick wall added to the shop, with facilities in place to allow you to collect missing parts from your existing Lego sets, as well as building your own custom set by picking out all the individual parts too!

To conclude, Legoland probably doesn’t need quite as much doing to it as what Flamingo land does, but it could still use a few changes here and there and new additions to the already great line-up!

Blog, Fantasy

Flamingo Land – What I’d do if I were in charge

Loops&Lapbars

Welcome to a new series of blogs I’d like to introduce. In these blogs I intend to talk about many of the UK’s parks, what I like and what I don’t. These are purely from a fantasy point of view and more so, just a bit of fun!

I’ve been meaning to talk about Flamingo Land a few times now. We visited in July 2021 and I did intend to blog about our day but was kept busy with the holiday blogs so it fell to the wayside. I feel there is a lot to talk about with this park so thought I’d do it here at the same time as discussing changes I’d make if I were in charge!

The good stuff

Flamingo Land has some really decent rides, especially its roller coasters. Velocity, Mumbo Jumbo and Kumali are all fine examples of their respective types, and a couple are quite unique in their own right. Velocity is the only Booster Bike rollercoaster in the UK, Mumbo Jumbo is the steepest, and though people give Hero a lot of negativity, it’s a unique take on flying and the only Zamperla Volare in the UK too.

The spiral lift hill of Hero

The zoo is also good and though it has a lot of different species, it isn’t too spread out and kept to one side of the park, away from the noisier rides. I also like that they do a lot of work for conservation, much like Chessington does in their zoo.

The not so good

The first thing I think needs discussing with Flamingo Land is its dire lack of proper theming and how untidy the park looks!

The park does have named areas such as Metropolis, Dino Stone Park and Lost Kingdom Reserve, but they all feel a little lacking. Dino Stone Park is probably the better area in the park as it has a few dinosaurs scattered about and a bit of theming here and there but not much!

There is also a fair few buildings that are standing but either don’t have a use or have seemingly been left abandoned. Specifically around the side of Velocity. Now this could be an access route for construction traffic to build their new rollercoaster, but if this is the case, couldn’t they close it off from view a little bit? If it’s not the case then they could really utilize it better than leaving it in a state.

Will this new ride open in 2022? Hopefully!

Next is the shocking lack of merchandise on offer at the park. This will be a common complaint from me in many of my future ‘What I’d Do’ blogs.

So what would I do about it?

We’ve seen what Paulton’s Park can do with their theming and I’d love to see Flamingo Land get the same sort of treatment.

Metropolis would look great with some facias put up around Hero, include the new 10 inversion rollercoaster and Velocity in the overall theme and add a shop beside Velocity that sells Metropolis ride themed merchandise.

Velocity is the only Vekoma Booster Bike ride in the UK.

Lost Kingdom Reserve could do with seeing a load more rock work and planting, and a general tidy up, repaint some of the existing theming on Mumbo Jumbo and Kumali and add a bit more static theming here and there. Maybe some tribal huts or a campsite or something like that.

An overview of Splosh, and the River Reserve areas of the park

I’d put some really good quality animatronics in around Dino Stone Park too, and really lean into the prehistoric theme! There’s some decent rockwork surrounding Pterodactyl that I’d love to see extended a bit more around the area, and the plants and green spaces spruced up.

Navigator in action

The entrance to the park could do to see some work too. I feel that the Pirates of Zanzibar show and stage are great to welcome visitors but the area surrounding it hasn’t got the same theme and it feels a bit mismatched!

To the left of the entrance is a large plot of unused land that I feel could be used for a new entrance to the park, with it leading through the lost River Reserve area before Metropolis. To achieve this, I’d swap all the rides in both areas around so that you’d be greeted with a safari themed area, before the other areas of the park.

This is of course a purely hypothetical idea as it would cost far too much to move the rides about! It would mean that you’d see Lost River Reserve, followed by Dino Stone Park and then a Pirate themed area too before Metropolis.

As for the ride line up at Flamingo Land, personally I think its decent. It has a good mix of thrill rides, transportation and gentle rides, as well as rides for younger audiences too. I don’t think much is needed at the park, especially when their 10 inversion rollercoaster opens, but they could maybe do with a few more flat rides here and there, or an interactive dark ride!

A Peahen and her chicks

I’d really like to see an obscure record breaker here again, since Mumbo Jumbo did once hold the record as world’s steepest roller coaster. Something along the lines of that, or maybe a particularly long coaster or an exceptionally themed one would go down well.

I don’t really think anything needs removing as such, since most of the rides seem to fit in the parks overall line up, though I would remove Flip Flop and replace it with something like a Top Spin, heavily themed so it fits in the Splosh area of the park and make sure it interacts properly with water jets.

Another drone shot showing more of the park

I know it used to have a Waikiki Wave called Tidal Wave until 2008, and it would be great to see another one as they’re dying out all over the place and it would fit right at home here.

I’d also do some work on Mischief Mansion and turn it into an interactive shooting ride, along the lines of Laser Raiders at Legoland. Keep the theme and family friendly fun, but add some guns, targets and activatable effects to help it stand out from the others. I know we have a good selection of these in the UK, but only Laser Raiders and Sheriff Showdown have interaction between the targets and animatronics.

I’d leave Muddy Duck Farm mostly untouched as it’s a fine area on its own. The rides suite the area, there isn’t much theming but I don’t feel it needs it.

Other than that, I think the park isn’t bad in its current state, but far from the best. I’ve essentially laid out my hypothetical plans to turn Flamingo Land into Paulton’s of the north. I think Paulton’s is a great park on it’s own but Flamingo Land has much more thrilling rides so could very easily stand on its own, especially since Lightwater Valley seems to be moving towards a younger audience!

Final thoughts

For me, Flamingo Land sits somewhere between Fantasy Island, Oakwood and Drayton Manor. All 3 of those parks do similar things to Flamingo Land, targeting the audiences that Merlin Entertainment and Blackpool Pleasure Beach don’t manage to entice into their properties and Flamingo Land should be doing the same.

Currently it’s probably middle of the table when stacked against the other attractions here in the UK, but with investment and a good plan for the future, it could easily sit on par with Paulton’s Park or even play with the big boys like Alton Towers or Pleasure Beach!